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9th February, 20044th January, 2004
The Spelling Police
It's well known that computer programmers cannot spell. There is definitely something mutually exclusive about the programming and the spelling gene that prevents then from co-existing in the same DNA...		 Arise Sir Tim
It seems that once again the Palace has overlooked my contribution to journalism and left me out of the New Year's honours! Perhaps they thought I would turn one down, clearly being a man of principle...
10th November, 200317th October, 2003
On the Net, no one knows you're a fish
Last week I made some new friends in San Diego...		 Who needs an emotional computer?
The sadder members of my profession have always taken great delight in giving their computers names...
25th September, 200322nd August, 2003
I want to pay more for my flights!
Yesterday I booked two flights to Belfast for the princely sum of zero pounds. I secured the return flights for the same crazy fee, but I would have been much happier paying more...		 A patch a day helps you work, rest and play.
Another week another record-breaking virus, and as one pundit put it to me "it's deja vu - all over again...
8th August, 200311th July, 2003
Not quite pukka
Last week someone e-mailed me Jamie Oliver's new, yet to be released, cookbook. Like most I assumed it was a virus, but it turned out to be almost pukka...		 Officer, those MPEGS aren't mine
Like most people of my music generation, I have slowly been converting my prized vinyl record collection to a CD one. Re-buying digitally re-mastered nostalgia from a mis-spent youth must have proved very profitable for the record industry...

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